Hazelnut lates and baby chinos
Posted October 22, 2012on:
One thing I have noticed about being a writer is the amount of time I have spent writing something, only for it to have to walk its way to the bin, much like in monopoly ‘Go to jail, do not pass go and don’t even attempt to collect that mouthwatering $200 on the way’ never to see the light of day again.
It happens a lot with us writers, whether we are typeing in word or writing on paper, we can spend hours upon hours and drink caffeinated drink after caffeinated drink, only to find ourselves throwing out or deleting what we have just written.
I have written so many things over the past few weeks and I have just thrown them out or deleted them, mainly because the things I have written are just emotionally fueled hate speech’s against some people in my life, which I don’t actually mean – in that case thank god for the delete button.
This post was inspired by http://olycam.wordpress.com/2012/10/21/wasted-time/ where as you can see in the photo there is a sign that says “I’ve spent most of my life drinking coffee, the rest I’ve just wasted”
I feel this applys to how I am feeling right now. Upon catching up with a friend I had not seen in about 5 years, I realized, much like most of my writings, my life too seems to be going to waste – take away the whole having a son and being pregnant thing, I’m not talking about that.
It just made me realize I really hadn’t done much in the past 5 years apart from
-experiment with drugs
-gotten into a lot of pointless relationships (excluding most recent)
-get into trouble
-get pregnant again
-move state again
-wait for c-section date
-and look after my son
It’s funny because my mum just said “I don’t know how anyone can complain about having nothing to do, I always have something to do but never have enough time” – my mum is someone that can always find something to do.
I need to find more to do. And I need to stop wasting my writings. From now on I won’t be throwing away what I have written or deleting it. because you never know when it might come in handy.
Back to my friend. We caught up for coffee after so many years of not seeing each other. The last time I saw him I was pretty much doing my walk of shame home from a night of under aged drinking, he had broken down on the side of the road and we chatted briefly then I continued my adventure home.
Sipping at my hazel nut late while my son was covering himself in baby chino, I listened to my friend tell me about everything that had happened since I had last seen me. Basically, he has a daughter is a baker and is saving up for a house.
We took my son to go see a petting zoo aswell, then I went home.
when one door closes, another door opens – but if you don’t don’t close that door behind you, the past will forever be by your side.
I need to get out more – take my son places more like petting zoos and cafes for baby chinos with mum.
I might feel like I’ve wasted the past 5 years of my life just because my friend has ideally done more than me, but I have just gone down a different path. Much like with throwing away the piece of writing you spent hours on – its not that its shit and you wasted your time on it, its just that at the time maybe its best that it doesn’t get seen by anyone and you re-visit it later.