Posts Tagged ‘blog’
Abyissful thinking
Posted on: May 24, 2013
I often think of topics to write about, as if there were endless topics. Fact is there are endless things to write about, I just fear most are bland.
I don’t go out much and like most stereotypical writers, given the chance, you would find me hunched over a vintage typewriter, in the center of a white room talking to myself.
“Yes the world does revolve around me” I would say, staring into the vortex of nothingness you call a wall.
Walls are pretty boring without art, or maybe they aren’t because you have an amazing imagination and you can picture anything on your wall.
Unlike me, my imagination is broken.
Oh crap, I need another coffee
My floor shelf
Posted on: March 28, 2013
Yes you did read that right, my floor shelf… Because I have a floor shelf. Not a book shelf a floor shelf, that I have since added to and need to pack in boxes (well 1 box).
When I moved here I had the daunting task of deciding what books to take with me and what ones to leave behind and collect later, well when we have our own place again.
Who knew packing books was a hard task, but luckily I will have my full collection back – as soon as I get a book shelf. So packing my books and she’s was easy this time, they all just fit in one box.
I felt like this post should be a sharing post about why I have surtain books :p
Lets start with this one, its an autobiography written my Martha Long. I haven’t read it just yet, but I did buy it because I was drawn to the initial idea that someone had it harder than I did and still came out on top – books like these draw me in, we are all interested in other people’s lives and an autobiography is the best way to read about someone’s life.
I am a few chapters into this book, so far so good. Its hard to read something written by such an amazing author who is stuck with the label “The author of the harry porter series” it isn’t really a bad thing, but it does sort of set the standard if you know what I mean. I am hoping this book is just as amazing, in its own non harry potter way.
This is by far one of my favorite books, no matter what anyone says. I absolutely love this book and I can and do read it over and over again, plus I have also watched the movie. This book and the Scott westerfeild series ‘The midnighters’ will always be my favorites until I die…
This book in particular was such a help to me, I insit you all go out and buy it and read it :p
And mums you should read this one.
Ahhh William, your work is so… Just right there in that book
These books are really helpful – yes is you haven’t already noticed or learnt, I am a sucker for self help books, because there should always be room for improvement in everyone’s life. No matter what form you seek it in.
This is a cute little book filled with many different, interesting and crazy ways to show affection to loved ones.
Just a few cool photos from the books, oh my wouldn’t you love your washing machine to be filled with flowers like that?
This book helped me to be less afraid of things that were out of my control, and also to understand what real courage is and where fear comes from. I once herd a line in a movie (oh no here comes a cheesy movie quote) “Real courage isn’t knowing when to end someone’s life, its knowing when not too”
I recently bought this and haven’t read it yet alone with these two books.
I specifically bought withuring heights because a lot of people don’t like it… And its like they say, you can’t judge a book by its cover (although sometimes I buy books because I like the cover)
I need the other books (there are many) in this series, if you know Anne rices’ writings, which you might be familiar with her if you have seen “Interview with a vampire” and “Queen of the damed.”
I am a few chapters into this book, its by brother in laws book I’m pretty sure, he lent it to his mum and she said I could read it – thankfully I am not one of those book thiefs and it will safely return to hos bookshelf, or hers – who ever wants it first :p
I have yet to read this book – so I guess um ‘Review pending’
This book recently entered my collection, as you all know I am studying to eventually make it to the top and obtain my PH.D. in neuroscience, but it means that I have to go right back to the beginning and learn everything again from chem to biology and so on and so fourth. Thing is, people get the wrong idea when they meet someoen who didn’t finish school… Lets just clear something up if you don’t already know. I did not finish school due to being severely bullied… I am actually (well used to be once upon a time) a grade A+ student… Oh yes the girl is a smart one… Hard to believe right, ok… Stop joking around now.
Do this is a book I have read before, and I will read it again to re-cap anything I have missed. It used to be my mothers. I find even if the information you learn is old and outdated, and may be disproven now, it is still really important when in the science field that you know what used to be, what isn’t and what is now until proven otherwise.
Yes… A book about improving your vocabulary and using ‘big words’, why did I buy this book? Well going back to your life have room for improvement, this is one those books for improving your life… Well your vocabulary – problem is, I knew most of the words in this book, I just chose not to use them because I don’t want to sound up myself and better than by using these words… Besides everyone here thinks I am weird, have an accent and I grew up with my English family…
My DVDS… Yes I love them all, I don’t mind of you don’t… The mummy was the first ‘horror’ I saw and all the others in the series I am a sucker for. I have always been obsessed with Egyptian things, and I used to be a belly dancer (before I had my kids and had c-sections for them both) I will probably return to it after I lose more weight (I am down to 65kgs now). My eldest sons name is also Egyptian.
And this book… ‘Act like a lady, think like a man’. This book seriously helped me ditch male ‘friends’ that were clearly sticking around, waiting for my relationship to crumble… Too bad guys.
This is a book written by a man, about men but its for women – I think all women should get it, because men are sneaky, even when they do love us.
And this is where they were all kept before I packed them in the box, my floor shelf – you were great while I had you, but I need to move on and upgrade now. Its been great!
Who are you?
Posted on: March 6, 2013
Who are you.
If it was not for your facade, you would be no one.
No one but a mere spec of human flesh and bones drifting upon the earth.
Like a leaf floats down a stream.
Who are you compared to your superiors.
To your friends and to your family.
Who are you to share your opinions based on what you’ve taken from others.
We have not known of the real you.
You have not known of the real you.
Who are you
And who am I?
We have all been in that situation, you know the one when you walk into someones home and the woman of the house in practically in her underwear, or there is a woman in the shopping mall who should really put some more clothes on. Well I have definitely been there.
Sex sells – we all have grasped the concept of that, but in this day and age we aren’t all prostitutes, so why are women dressing like they are one?
In writing this particular post, I admit to once upon a time dressing with such vulgarity that you would rather lock me in a room and not let me out on the street. But these days, I would rather dress like a mother, not a woman on the prowl seeking her next victim.
It’s funny that this particular subject came up in conversation while talking with a friend and then again with my partner not too long ago. We were discussing various ways women can degrade themselves by wearing different clothes and acting a certain way. This is one of the many reasons I love the show ‘Ladette to Lady’ and I think a lot of people could learn a lot from this show and shows like ‘Snog, Marry, Avoid’.
Ladett to lady
Snog Marry Avoid
These shows teach women that Men don’t want to see you in your underwear… unless it is in the proper Intimate moment or unless you are in a porn video… and life is not a porno, so why are there girls (yes girls) as young as 6 these days, parading the streets in their underwear.
I know that a lot of woman think that being able to dress like this no matter what shape or form empowers them and they don’t care what others think. But it isn’t really empowering at all, and quite frankly it is very unflattering – No matter what size you are.
But it isn’t just in the streets, it’s all over the internet aswell – especially social media sites where the images are public to EVERYONE if they happen to get into the wrong hands. This like posting pictures of yourself in your underwear to show everyone ‘I am confident in my skin’ when really you could just write a status about it and be done with it. When people see an image of someone in barley nothing, whether they are pregnant or just lost weight they don’t think ‘Wow’ you look amazing with nothing on… they thing ‘Ok is there something wrong with that person?’ Well that is what I think anyway, especially when if I can stumble upon pictures like that accidentally, who intentionally is behind the screen using the images for their own personal joy or who is planning on using it to completely embarrass you for the rest of your like eg: make a meme out of your embarrassing picture?
Gosh! who knew writing a blog post about self-respect could be so hard?
Maybe if they taught Etiquette in every school we wouldn’t have this problem.
Please share your thoughts.
The egotistical writer within.
Posted on: March 4, 2013
“I almost always urge people to write in the first person. … Writing is an act of ego and you might as well admit it.”
—William Zinsser
William is right when he says writing is an act of ego – well it definitely is for me. Every post I write on my blog and every page I write for my book just feeds it. But this isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
I think as a writer, it is important to have an egotistical attitude because if we cant love our own work, how do we expect others to love it aswell?
I find writing can be used as a growth and development tool for self confidence, reading, writing and emotion.
When I wrote My addiction to writing in my head it was by far my greatest post yet, and ever since then I have much higher expectations for my blog. How do we top our greatest posts if we have already belted out the ‘best’ by our standard?
Although with all my recipe posts, they taste great… But it hardly feels like the writing I need for my blog. I’ve got a few awards posts in drafts still waiting for me to finish them.
If writers stopped writing about what happened to them, then there would be a lot of empty pages. ~ Elaine Liner
This is what our blogs are for, to write the good, the bad, the ugly, the best, the controversial, the tastiest, the boring and the posts to feed our ego.
They are like our fillers for when we have writers block on our books and they are there to host our idea’s and keep them grounded on our hand made pedestals waiting for that award winning post to reach number one.
We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospection.~ Anais Nin
For those of you who are wondering, I posted my first draft copy, of my first chapter, of my first novel and for the first time. That is a lot of firsts.
http://allworldissues.com/2012/12/05/rubys-notes-chapter-1-draft-thoughts/
I asked people for constructive criticism (yes good and bad) one thing you need to realize if you want to publish your work – you need to seek the criticism, and face the music – otherwise how are you going to improve and make it better?
Last night I spent a bit of time editing it (old school paper and pen style)
here is some of the edited copy – And for those who are wondering ALL my work IS in fact Copyrighted. So don’t be thieving 
–
Being a school teacher wasn’t all it had cracked up to be. Sure there were a few perks, seeing the smiles on those children’s faces every time I entered the room, just as easily they smiled when it was time to pack their bags and go home, teaching them all about how the world works… How much they actually listen to is a different story. My name is Ruby, Ruby Kensington but you can call me Miss K.
I’m not married, I don’t even have a boyfriend, I don’t have children of my own and I don’t have any friends. No I am not a weirdo or maybe I am. You can decide that for yourself. I’m going to tell you a story about how I ended up in the position I am in.
June 28th 8:40pm. 1993
It was the 90’s and I was fresh out of law school, already I had already received my first job offer. I was desperate, so I went for it not knowing quite what I was getting myself into. We had arranged to meet at 9am the next day to discuss what the job involves, the only problem was that I did not know who I was meeting or why. I had received the phone call out of the blue, and the person I had spoken to did not go into any detail about the job, they just gave me a time and the address of where I would be meeting my ‘potential employer.’ When you are a lawyer, you don’t think too much about those types of phone calls – although I would have preferred to pick the location myself.
That night I had a group date with my best friends Chloe and Sandra.
They had been my friends since we were in law school. Chloe had long blond hair with colors running through it, pinks, purples, blues and oranges. She was short, maybe 5’2 and she was very socially awkward. When Chloe was younger she really wanted to be a hairdresser, but her mum forced her into attending law school. Chloe didn’t want to upset her mother, so, she used her talents with hair as a side business as a way to make some extra cash. Now Sandra on the other hand was the complete opposite. Sandra was a girl of status in the law industry – as her dad was a lawyer. She was tall with luscious tanned legs that go for miles. Sandra had dark hair and dark eyes, with a European look to her plus she was really skinny and everything about her screamed sexy. Sandra always had all the guys pining over her like little puppies, even though she turned them all down.
As the night progressed I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was being watched. You know the type of feeling you get when you think there is someone who just won’t stop staring at you? The hairs on the back of your neck stand up and cold shivers run down your spine, as if someone had ‘just walked over your grave’ as they say. That’s the feeling I had now, so I decided to call it a night with my friends and walk home.
As I was walking I started to feel dizzy, queasy even… did I really drink that much? A few minutes passed by and I couldn’t bring myself to walk any further. I hailed the first cab I saw and jumped in. My house was about a 10 minute walk away from our favorite hangout but I just couldn’t bear to walk any longer. The taxi drive made me feel worse. I wasn’t even sure if I was even in a taxi anymore and I just passed out.
–
It’s going to be a hot summer.
Posted on: November 29, 2012
Today I went for a walk – by myself!
Shocking I know, I just walked up the road, to my local deli. It is about 400 meters from my house and I was really tired. I bought a pasty, fruit salad and a V Energy drink.
I decided I would take a few photos on the way up there, to share with you all. They are just some flowers but I miss taking photos and happen to be fairly good at it considering I am using my phone.
This is the first flower, it has lots of tiny little white bugs on it.
This was one of the few, still alive, flowers on this bush.
These tree leaves were pretty 
so they had to join in.
These beautys came from a huge tree filled with them
I believe these are just generic pink roses.
Last night I made a few mini pavlova’s
Setesh is cheeky – I ended up giving him the rest in the end.
Atlas is 3 weeks old tomorrow 
I am one proud mamma
More paper please.
Posted on: November 28, 2012
It’s been a while since I have written more for my novel. The break is much needed – but it wasn’t intentional.
I’ve only had my laptop 11 months now, and about 4 months ago, my toddler destroyed it – he pulled off majority of the keys, somehow deactivated the little touchy mouse pad thing and about a week later the charging doc stoped working.
Now ofcourse I backed up my work – I’ve printed out the chapters and there should be a copy on dads computer, and a USB somewhere.
What bothers me about the situation us not having a computer in general – I would like to get a new laptop, but splurging on a new laptop would be a horrible stab to my bank account – which I can not afford at all.
I was hoping to get atleast half of my novel written by the end of the year, but now it looks like I am going to have to extend that until middle of next year – maybe.
The problem is, having no computer really sucks – if you are wondering – I write all my blog posts on my phone (which would explain the spelling and grammar errors you may come across.)
Sure – I could use my dads computer, but I cant read the screen properly, my eyes have gotten worse since I have had my glasses (6 months) – I get head aches now and my eyes hurt – so its too painful to sit and write at my dads computer with his obscene computer screen.
I would write it all on paper, but I don’t have enough and have no time to buy more at the moment.
So I guess I am thankful for this break.
Question: How do you feel with where you are at, personally with your writing?
Eg: emotions and thoughts on it.
Eat pray love
Posted on: November 26, 2012
“But, a friend took me to the most amazing place the other day, it’s called Augusteum. Octavian Augustus built it to house its remains.
When the barbarian came in, they trashed it along with everything else. The great Augustus, Romes first true great empiror, how can he even imagine that, Rome, the whole world as far as he was concerned, one day will be in ruins.
It’s one of the quietest and loneliest places in Rome. The city has grown up and around it over centuries; feels like a precious wound, like a heart break you won’t let go off, as it hurt too good.
We all wanted things to stay the same David. Settle for living in misery because we are afraid of change, things crumbling to ruins.
Then I looked around this place, at the chaos it’s endured, the way it’s been adapted, burned, pillaged and found the way itself to build up again. And I was reassured maybe my life has’t been so chaotic it’s just the world it is and the real trap is getting attached to any of it.
Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation. Even in this eternal city, the Augusteum showed me we must always be prepared for endless ways of transformation.”
Tonight I watched the movie ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ and this particular part of an email Liz wrote to her recent love affair stood out to me – ment something to me.
Not because she was telling him she couldn’t be with him, but because what she said and how it makes me feel.
Something I am far to familiar with is being scared of change – usually it was I that was scared of change, but now its just everyone around me is scared about my life changing from what it is right now.
Why? It’s a question I ask myself all the time – because honestly it feels like people around me rely on me to be there, to make them feel needed, loved and important. If this were to change their would might feel like its in ruins – but why are they afraid?
At the end of the day I’m just there, in the background, with an opinion on everything, with an extra unwanted comment to make, another mouth to feed, another couple hundred dollars to add to all the bills – for what? So people can feel needed – truth is I did need them, I did need help – but I’m always going to need help, but I need to help myself, because I am no longer a child.
You can’t always get what you want they say, this applies to not getting that toy you asked your mother for last christmas, or that girl who doesn’t want to date you anymore because she likes another boy – you may want it, you feel you need it, your life doesn’t feel completed without it and you feel as if its in ruins…
But really that’s just you not accepting that although you are in control of your life, there are somethings that are out if your hands, not your choice and that at the end of the day, doesn’t effect you as much as you think it does at the time.
What would happen if you just packed a bag full of things and left your life behind today, if you left your parents, if you left your lover or if you just left your housemate?
You could be anywhere in the world and back home life would go on as normal, sure for a little bit they might be angry and confused.
They might try and get you to come back or they tried to get you to stay. It’s not their choice to make in the first place, doesn’t stop them from believing that their wants come before your needs and happiness.
A bit of my advice for everyone.
Appreciate what you already have.
Want for others happieness, not rely on them for your own happieness.
Accept what you cannot control.
Accept the only thing you have control over is yourself.
Being the dictator won’t make you happy, and it won’t make others happy with you. Filter your thoughts about yourself and others.
Don’t brag about yourself too much – sometimes we all need a huge slice of humble pie.
Always remember, if you are unhappy with your life, where you live and who you surround yourself with, you have the power to change it and nobody has the right to tell you otherwise.
Listen to others opinions but don’t let it sway your decision – you might end up regretting not doing what you want.
Money isnt really a big deal – its just paper that proves nothing, you prove your wealth through how you treat others, not by how much more you have than others. Want for nothing but good health for you and your family.
Life is way to short to be stressing over things like housework and bills, bills can be paid, housework can be done, when you leave this world it will still be there when you leave and the world will keep spinning.
Just do what you want in your life, because your happieness is all that matters and shouldn’t be sacrificed to satisfy the wants of others
lets start at the begining
Posted on: November 20, 2012
2010, I was 43kg and extremely underweight. I thought I looked great and other days I thought I was fat. To be completely honest with you all – I hardly ate anything, I smoked, took drugs nearly every weekend by this point, sometimes even a few times a week. I drank more than my fair share of coffee and smoked well over enough to fuel a family of 4 smokers. I was not healthy and when I look back at old photos of me, I looked sick, anorexic almost and bones aren’t attractive.
before drugs
on drugs
September 2010 I fell pregnant to Setesh – This was probably the biggest turning point in my life, my partner and I were excited and shocked at the same time. Through that pregnancy, I assume my body would have freaked out because shot straight up to 83kg. Going from 43kg to 83kg – For people who use pounds that is 94.79 pounds to 182.98 – In 10 months, that was a huge jump and a massive shock to me.
I have always been thin – too thin 5 ft 2” in height and always have been 50kg or below, my mother had to buy me children’s pants once and send them interstate to me while I was living in Ballarat. I had nearly every item of clothing from primary school, and I wore them up until I started gaining weight in my pregnancy.
Come Labour Day I landed myself an emergency C-section and was placed under a general anaesthetic. I woke up in my ward – I was confused, I didn’t really know what had just happened, my child and partner were nowhere to be seen and I had a huge wound in my lower abdomen that I never wanted. 4 hours later and I met my son for the first time; the relief on my partners face that I was ok was heart-warming.
after op
I was bed ridden for 2 days before took those first extremely hard steps and the next 3 days were some of the hardest. I could not do anything, I couldn’t even change a nappy without shaking and my partner did everything. I even had the nurses express food from me for my partner to feed our baby. I never really did realise how much has done for me.
When we took the baby home, I was in pain in more ways than one – my wound and my heart. I felt disfigured from my unwanted surgery – even though so many other women out there have gone through the exact same – I felt like the only one, and that it had left me with an ugly body – I felt fat!
You can be big and beautiful they say, and I don’t doubt that, but there is a difference between being beautiful and feeling beautiful – I did not feel beautiful, at all!
christmas 2011
I think this lack of confidence in myself and my looks caused one of the problems I had in my relationship – when you feel ugly and disfigured, and you are with someone who you think is the most attractive man I the world, you can develop a small or large jealousy issue – depending on what type of person you are. Now I have to admit, I can get pretty jealous when it comes to Jordan, but I think it would have been at its worse the year after the C-section. Especially when we moved to his home town to live for a while, I mean what are you supposed to feel when your extremely attractive partner knows so many extremely attractive women – who mind you a lot of them stopped talking to him because they because angry at him for getting into a relationship with me.
In 2011 about 8-9 months after, I was just regaining my confidence back, losing weight a little (slowly) and coming to terms with my surgery, we found out we would be having another baby. I told my mum straight away – haha Skype’d her “guess what” and showed her the test to be exact. Everyone was excited – I was too.
One thing I thought about so much through this recent pregnancy was my weight. My stomach still looked dis-figured, I didn’t have that desirable baby bump – it looked for like a baby triangle to me. I remember a friend pointing it out, that’s when I noticed it and then of course I dwelled on it. I managed to lose 6 kgs in the pregnancy, and then slowly put it back on while baby grew.
It was a healthy pregnancy, this time afterwards; I don’t feel cheated or disfigured. I feel healthy, I may not be the happiest person, but I can accept myself most days, and I know I can change it.
37 weeks
It has been 11 days since Atlas was born and I have lost 9kgs, while I understand it is quite common to just drop around 10-12 kgs straight after. The sudden drop in weight has given me the confidence to keep going, keep losing weight. If not for me then I will do it for my family.
66 kgs
It has taken me about 3 days to actually complete this particular post. Editing things out and adding things instead. I didn’t want to delve into some things I will clear things up about one thing – My relationship with Jordan is better than ever right now.
In the time of writing this Mittens actually wrote a great post about her health –
http://mittenskittens.wordpress.com/2012/11/18/yeah-i-photographed-my-lunch/
Upon finishing her post she asked the question:
“What is your favourite healthy meal or snack? Or what makes you feel really great?”
My answer is a bowl of veggies. Plain ole boring veggies
