I wish I was super mum – more so I wish she existed, and that she could come give me lesson. But much like most things to good to be true – they aren’t there and sadly never will be. I envy those mums who get up at 6am, have breakfast on the table by the time the kids are awake, kids get ready for school and by 10am mum has the house spotless, washing done and is down at the beauty salon getting her nails done.with her girlfriends… I envy those mums – why? Well because they are ‘super mum’ But they are also only on TV. Why be envious of the picture perfect scripted, acted, fake TV mum? The same reason women are envious or the airbrushed ‘skinny’ but in real like voluptuous women we see plastered all over the media – it is pretty much shoved in our face. But why the mum in particular? Well, since becoming a mother I have noticed a few things… Most mothers treat it like a competition, who’s child walks, talks and jumps through hoops first – shit if horse’s weren’t so expensive, every baby would have one now and they would be upgraded as regularly as the latest apple product came out. I came to this realization when my first son was born. All the mothers I knew were sharing where their children were at, development wise, and so I joined in with my friends because, well, they were my friends right? Wrong! I shared what my son had just learnt and wow! I had never been so shocked at a fellow mothers behavior towards me. Suddenly I was being called stupid by not just 1 mother, 3 of them… These girls who were supposed to be my friends, my support group, were suddenly abusing me for what my son had learnt to do? Yeah I can say for sure now – glad that didn’t last!
So why so competitive? Why is it such a huge problem to some mums if someone else’s child can crawl, walk or talk earlier before there’s? I know mothers with special needs children and you know what – they encourage all the non special needs children to achieve their best, they help them and they not once get angry because the seemingly ‘normal’ child does stuff before their child. So why aren’t we all taking a lesson from their book?
I’ve written a few posts about social media and how it has effected me, but honestly how does it effect you? When we are on social media sites, we are bombarded with advertisments, mainly of the fitness variety, telling us we need to be lose weight and be skinny and we can do it with these magic pills, or this meal replacement which happens to just be flavoured powder full of crap. We are faced with many images of our skinny friends and our overweight friends, our rich friends, our poor friends and that group of friends, that quite frankly, you wonder if they were raised on the street’s. We get app requests and game requests, we can like pages and we have pages suggested to us. We are faced with photos of sick children or abused animals, telling us if we don’t click a button on the screen then we are horrible people – much like of we aren’t skinny then we are unattractive people.
When we give birth we are given all these pamphlets, magazines and webside URLs, that tell us, when out child his thus age they should be doing this… Yes special needs Children aren’t left out of this game. We are told by nurses, midwives, doctors, specialists and well you get the idea, every professional under the sun “your child isn’t developing ‘normally’ like the other children” if they are the slightest off the milestone chart, and you are abused by jealous mothers and your child leaves those professionals astounded and confused, of your child is seemingly ‘ahead’ of all the other children.
It is no wonder some mums get jealous if their children don’t hit their ‘milestones’ It’s something that is bought up constantly throughout a child’s life. This does not exclude height and weight. We all want to be ‘super mum’ because we don’t want to fail our children as a parent, its why we want them to be ‘ahead’ or seek an explanation or diagnosis if they aren’t.